Friday, November 9, 2012

Then vs Now

Day 9 NaHeBloPoMo:

Tell a descriptive story about a memory...


Not a single cloud dotted the beautiful azul sky as boyfriend, his father, and I set out on our first joint hike. I wore a simple gray t-shirt, jeans, and sneakers; two of which clung tightly to my bulging curves. Despite being severally overweight, I was determined to enjoy the great outdoors and make the trek to Horsetooth Falls and back with my fitter counterparts.

Although we had been together for years and took frequent trips to his parents house only minutes from, we hadn't hiked the trails at Horsetooth Reservoir together. Even knowing that I was about to willingly participate in an amount of exercise my body hadn't seen, I was tricking myself into believing I wasn't that out of shape and I could easily accomplish this feat.

2.2 miles was nothing, right?


The trip was agonizing. Beautiful, but distressing. I was panting and wheezing not even half way to the falls. My lungs HURT. My legs HURT and there was nary a real incline or step along the winding path. It embarrassed me to have to pause; to be so far behind boyfriend and father that they stopped to let me catch up. It was especially painful to see a look in his eyes that was as if he were verbally telling me I shouldn't have come. Not that he wouldn't be proud when I finished, but that this was ugly and too much, too soon.

More than once I wanted to turn back. More than once I wanted to just sit right there and wait for them to finish and come get me afterwards. I needed to rest. Heck, I needed to STOP. Would it be too much to have someone carry me out?

It was then, on the way back when I tripped over a protruding rock and went sprawling. My knee and hand were scraped and throbbing, but more than that my pride was hurt. I was really too fat and out of shape to do this. My boyfriend lovingly helped me up and made sure I was okay, which felt more like an insult than anything else. I dusted myself off and tried to fight back the tears as I let them go ahead of me again.

By the time we got back to the house, I was defeated to the point that I wanted to sit on the couch all day. So I did.


Fast forward four years...

I felt like I owed it to myself to defeat Horsetooth and it's hiking trails. Since losing all the weight I had been back several times, but today I was going all out. Today, my hike was going to take me from the south end all the way to the north end.

By the time I finished I had hiked over 15 miles. It took me 9 hours to finish, stopping only for lunch and a bathroom break at the north most outlet. I had sadly run out of the 64 ounces of water 3/4 of the way through, but was able to get to the top of the Horsetooth Falls for a quick drink.

It was the biggest triumph to conquer such a task. I couldn't move my arms or shoulders from carrying a backpack all day, but man was it worth it.

I had come a long way; from not being able to hike that 2.2 miles to backpacking 15 along a rocky and steep path that was meant for mountain biking.

What a glorious turn of events.


I think about these two events all the time. It's pretty amazing! Especially as I get ready to start training for a half marathon :)

((This is not the same boyfriend as the one from previous, but since moving to Texas we've done a lot of hiking! This one is of us at Red Rocks in Colorado.))


Day 9 NaNoWriMo:

Well, I did some writing yesterday while at work! YEAH! Not nearly enough to actually catch up, but I will be doing so today as well as Sunday (tomorrow is kind of shot). Thanks to a buddy that gave a great writing tip -- sprints! She does them several times a day...just 10-15 minute writing sprints. There's a Twitter @NaNoWordSprints that sporadically does these throughout the day.


Day 5 Meditation Challenge:

I had a weird sensation today. I'm in the process of swapping out my summer to winter clothes, which apparently is a daunting task and is taking me forever, so my meditation area consists of my computer chair. I try to make sure I sit tall and rest my hands in my lap... well today; I don't know if I was falling asleep, but I know I was actively, mentally reciting the days mantra and envisioning something beautiful (because, isn't that what we're supposed to do?) when my body did this weird jolt. It didn't hurt, it was just an upright snapping jolt that actually startled me enough to open my eyes. It was seriously the oddest sensation. Not quite like that almost asleep at my desk and then spasm and suddenly become fully awake one either. Weird...


Week 3, Day 19 Eating for Energy:

I made butternut squash soup! It's great! It's raw and awesome :)  I brought it for all day today (topping it with sprouts, tomato, avocado, and hemp seed) and have a big mason jar left for the weekend. Since I'll be gone a good portion of it, I need to make some green juice also since my vegetables are on the cusp of going bad. I also plan on hitting up Spiral Diner after my ALS walk tomorrow. That place is pretty darn amazing!

I've been drinking protein powder infused beverages in the morning and I kind of see a big change in attitude and energy the past couple days. Diggin' it!



About to go have my health care advocate look up a good podiatrist for me. I shall be visiting them next week!

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